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💔 Un paseo por los pesares



It's been almost an entire month—nearly two—since I write a text I like. My writing guide at the end of every video says: "Whatever you do, keep writing."

    Yes! I know! But how can I keep creating worlds when my imagination seems to be against me? I'm not too fond of the last plots I have been doing. 

   

    Today, while I was trying to find my way after having several classes with some students and realizing how tired my spirit was. I decided I required to feel something fresh, unique. After a short prayer—where I asked for that sign—a friend came to help me. 


    Jose Eduardo, also known as Cesar Dudson, has been a family friend for a long time. More than a musician and a writer, he was my oldest brother's best friend and Jesus', my youngest brother, teacher.

Two months before his arrival, he posted on Facebook a picture of him finishing "his final notes," that's when I decided to send him a message.

"The day you finish those thoughts, bring me one copy if possible. I'll pay for them."


    As you may have guessed, the day arrived. Eduardo arrived home on his black-and-gray bike to deliver me his first book, "Un paseo por los pesares," a compilation of his best notes—already printed and signed. 


    After a couple of minutes of talking to one another, my family and I invited him to pass home, and we started talking about future projects. I informed him about my idea of writing a science-fiction novel in English. He appreciated that risk and encouraged me to do it. Even though I try to keep me inspired most of the time, he told me what I wanted to hear, precisely when I needed it.


    The moment I had the book on my hands, I said, 'Man, I want to write the second one.'" Jose said. His black eyes struck my soul with unbridled passion.

I discovered what has been happening to me these last days. I lost control of what I thought I had. The only way to get out of this pessimistic mindset I adopted two days ago can be resumed in four words; I need a change. 


    In a quick summary, these are the small modifications I have planned to accomplish.

  1. I will change my laptop with my brother because the one I use doesn't work correctly; an unfortunate setback killed it. Its only issue is the WiFi range. 
  2. I will stop working in the living room. I live with several people, and their daily crossing in front of me is perturbing my concentration. Two new guys arrived the past week. Therefore, they destroyed my comfort zone. I appreciate that. Sometimes a change is necessary. 
  3. I will sleep earlier like I used to do before Alan and Ariosto's arrival. At 9:00 p.m.
  4. I will embrace my spiritual personality anew. I have noted that life goes better that way. Let's begin with small steps.


    This essay wasn't a complaint letter. It was more like a "to-do list" for my self-esteem. To push and show me what else I can do. Thanks, Eduardo, for showing this guy the path again. 


    And Cesar Arturo, this is for you: Thanks for not being that aggressive with yourself; it's been just an inadequate month. See you tomorrow, buddy.   


Onward...

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